So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Mom said you looked used
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
