Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize