He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
