Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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