she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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