guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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