How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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