fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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