question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
