Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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