you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
