Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
