Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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