Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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