I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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