Whod you bang
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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