Grow some girl-balls and come out already
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.