I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
