In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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