i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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