i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
