are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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