I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize