hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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