Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.