i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
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i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
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Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.