Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
