You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize