what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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