We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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