Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
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His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
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Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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