I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
