The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
false alarm, still single
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