Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
