before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
