real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
