Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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