I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
