What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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