She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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