Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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