there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
