I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize