I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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