Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
My cat gives me a boner
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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