Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
i need some magic done to my vagina
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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