your thong is hanging out like whoa
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
