Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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