Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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