Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
