im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
